I hate Valentines... if you can't tell. Lets call it what is really is; "Emotional Extortion Day".
But, since it Valentines, and I LOVE my bacon and egg breakfast sandwiches, I decided that I must show my love by having one for breakfast. Despite the fact that I'm in a diet trying to loose the weight I gained eating all that yummy Mexican food back in the US. Next door to where I work is a little breakfast/lunch cafe run by this Palestinian guy. He knows my weakness. I walk in and *voila*, there sitting in front of me is a perfect egg and bacon sandwich with American yellow mustard and tomatoes.... just the way I like it. The bastard even extends me credit when I forget to bring money. Grrrrrr.
I think I have the logic of an addict.
My ex-housemate, Engineer Katie, send me this lovely Valentines poem today. I love it. She claims to have gotten it from the Washington Post... whatever. But thank you Katie! Enjoy!
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Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss.
But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.*
(* "Pissed" is Australian for drunk, not "angry" as used in the US.)
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I thought that I could love no other.
Until, that is, I met your brother.
*************************
Roses are red, violets are blue,
sugar is sweet and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
the sugar bowl's empty, and so is your head.
*************************
Of loving beauty you float with grace.
If only you could hide your face.
***************************
Kind, intelligent, loving and hot.
This describes everything you are not.
***************************
I want to feel your sweet embrace.
But don't take that paper bag off of your face.
****************************
I love your smile, your face, and your eyes.
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!
****************************
My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.
****************************
I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.
******************************
My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?
******************************
My feelings for you no words can tell.
Except for maybe "go to hell".
*******************************
What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss.
But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.*
(* "Pissed" is Australian for drunk, not "angry" as used in the US.)
************************
I thought that I could love no other.
Until, that is, I met your brother.
*************************
Roses are red, violets are blue,
sugar is sweet and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
the sugar bowl's empty, and so is your head.
*************************
Of loving beauty you float with grace.
If only you could hide your face.
***************************
Kind, intelligent, loving and hot.
This describes everything you are not.
***************************
I want to feel your sweet embrace.
But don't take that paper bag off of your face.
****************************
I love your smile, your face, and your eyes.
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!
****************************
My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.
****************************
I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.
******************************
My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?
******************************
My feelings for you no words can tell.
Except for maybe "go to hell".
*******************************
What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
4 comments:
When you give me a hug
you smell like a bug
Honey, you've been hanging with the wrong chicks. This here chick knows that V-day is bullshit and what really matters is all 365 days of consistent love, giving and sharing and leaving alone. I truely don't think a gal can get any more shallow if her opinion of you depends on what you got her on V-day. Puleeez! FYI: I did LOVE the poems!
its all about whats in your heart. thats what really counts. rather you write your girlfriend a home made poem, give her a box of chocolates from the local grocery store, or take candy hearts and spell out a message about how you feel, take her to a special dinner, or buy her a rose. Thats what she will love. Thats what she will remember. And thats what she will brag to her friends about you need to look at it in another way!
Don't even know how I got to your site anyways. V Day is just an over commercialised day programmed by card and gift companies eager to put the guilt factor and up the depression factor for singles and lovers worldwide. Yes I am bitter. Yes I was broken up with 2 days after xmas. Explains the rant hey. I just want originality and small sentiments that come from the heart. A treasure hunt. An hour long massage. A collection of my fav overpriced glossy mags. A day of pampering. Just remember though peeps its not just about girls getting (vomit) roses its about watching out for the pricks as well. Don't believe the hype the real meaning is not the cost of the gift but the freedom of self expression.
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